Sawdust

The entire female population goes crazy for Michael Fassbender’s penis Michael Fassbender: the only name that can make women orgasm with just one mention. If…

No matter how much we wish it would, it’s clear that the 50 Shades of Grey fad is going nowhere anytime soon. Especially with the…

Ithaca College offers stunning new major The Park School is proud to present its newest major to Ithaca College: pornography. Head of Obscure Majors Clark…

Man discovers online girlfriend is actually Tom Hanks Is it forbidden love, like Romeo and Juliet? Or is it, well, something else? Norman “Moonslayer2342” Framingham,…

God descends from Heaven to confirm Kanye West as second coming Confusion, happiness, exalted praise, and jubilant rapping erupted across the world after the creator…

Or, you know, not The most wonderful time of the year is upon us again. There’s a beautiful layer of snow on the ground and…

More people skipping mass for Sunday mid-morning meals The Ithaca religious community is fearing an end to local spirituality as Ithacans replace weekend piety with…

In a time of national crisis, we college students have few things to look forward to. There’s the looming national debt, few promising job opportunities…

Christmas pageant rudely interrupted by second coming of Jesus BREAKING NEWS– (Dec. 1, 2013): Noodle, Texas- Hundreds of pint-sized, bratty pageant children and their obnoxious…

Campus believers find faith in the mythical Ithacat Enthusiasts of fun and exhilarating new religions such as Jediism will be in for a treat after…